“There is no path to happiness: happiness is the path.”
—attributed to Gautam Buddha
In 2018, I embarked on an 8,000-mile journey to meet the Dalai Lama. I meticulously planned the trip after learning that the man I had worshipped all my life would be in his adopted home in India. It would be the trip of a lifetime: an exuberant mother meeting the Boddhisatva of compassion, and sharing that audacious aspiration of loving-kindness with her sons.
We reached Dharamshala, nestled at the edge of the Himalayas, after a grueling 25-hour journey from Boston. All I could think about was meeting His Holiness; my lifelong dream was about to come true.
My bliss evaporated when I found out that the Dalai Lama had just left Dharamshala. To say that I was devastated would be an understatement.
On our final day in the Himalayan kingdom, we visited Norbulingka Institute, the epicenter of Tibetan culture. A young monk at the entrance informed us that parts of the monastery were closed—and my frustration resurfaced. I blurted out how unfortunate this trip had been for me.
With a twinkle in his eyes, he beckoned to us. “What would’ve been different if you had met His Holiness?” He continued, as if reading my mind: “You would’ve taken a selfie with him—right? That moment would’ve passed in a second, without you experiencing it. Maybe the universe is trying to tell you something. Enjoy these precious moments. Live these treasured experiences which you may never relive again.”
He named the things to be grateful for—my boys, the beauty around us—and his words woke me up. It was as if the maya (illusion) that had surrounded me was finally lifted. The loving force with which he gently admonished me was humbling. My initial resistance gave way to a sense of gratitude.
The truth was that I had traveled across the world to pose with the Dalai Lama. The meeting was going to be the trophy of my lifetime. My impulses had run counter to the teachings of the man I had revered.
I learned that day that the frame around us is the one perfect picture. Holiness is within us; wholeness is around us. A selfie with the Dalai Lama is just a moment in time.
Prayer
May we live every moment, even when the world seems to be closing down on us. May we cultivate the capacity to wage peace within us.